Comments on: Another Fine Google Search: “can men stop cheating”

By: Loushis

Loushis — Wed, 07 Jan 2009 22:14:22 +0000

I can totally relate to lapakache. It’s been almost two weeks that I have discovered my boyfriend of almost 7 years has been cheating on me. It first developed as friends and lead to a physical relationship. We have a 5 year old daughter and I did everything to take care of our family. I feel like I am mourning the death of a best friend. He says he was stupid and blind. He said he didn’t realize that he had the best thing in his life right in front of him. He has been friends with this girl for a while, almost two years and just got intimate 5 months ago. He says that he will do anything to have me back and that he would never F*** up again. He said that people can change. I don’t know what to believe. If I did not have my daughter it would be so easy. She thinks the world of him and she has no idea. What tears me apart is that not only did he ruin my life, but he ruined our family. I really feel like I am in a bad dream and can’t wake up. It is the worst pain I have ever experienced. Everyone keeps saying, “it’s your life, your choice.” Some say, forgot him, just take it one day at a time. I’m pretty much lost right now.

By: Laura

Laura — Thu, 20 Nov 2008 05:39:52 +0000

Oh by the way he is living in a trailer outside our home, how long should he stay out there?

By: Laura

Laura — Thu, 20 Nov 2008 05:31:05 +0000

I have been with my husband for 11 yrs and have discovered that he has cheated. We are in counseling. But it is or no one has been able to console me. Utimately it is up to me and I can’t trust him. But I love him. I have discovered that it is you and only you that can make the choice to leave.

By: lapakache

lapakache — Mon, 15 Sep 2008 23:04:02 +0000

my boyfriend of 2yrs cheated on me and the excuse he gave me was that i listened and praised my dad alot and he felt he had no control over me.Went to a party and met some girls who admired him,when asked whether he had a girl,he lied and a friendship began which later developed into a relationship. I was away at skul and got back,and found that he was mistreating me and was full of guilt. He got me engaged while dating the girl and in the same week he was caught at a party with a friend of mine. We are trying to work things out bt its so hard. Am in so much pain most of the time and we have a child. Am nt sure of the future.

By: Jeff Mac

Jeff Mac — Fri, 09 Nov 2007 12:30:21 +0000

Marissa: Ugh. I’m so sorry that happened. While I’m not totally sure how you were both “not in a relationship” and also betrayed, I think your last sentence is right on the money. In fact, I think the best advice about love is to avoid it if at all possible (not because it’s bad, but because if it’s the right situation, it won’t be possible to avoid.)

By: Marissa

Marissa — Thu, 08 Nov 2007 19:40:57 +0000

I’ve just been betrayed too. We were not officially in a relationship. Him and his brother live together and they had girls over when I unannounced went over to drop him of some mail. He claimed he was just going to go to sleep because he had to go to work the next day. I went back and heard him going at it.He claims he is VERY sorry and that he was just drunk and thought it was over between us since we got into big argument and I caught him partying with other girls.He says he wants to make me his girlfriend he just needs some time. ( he was in a 5 yr relationship). I think we should just be friends and let him have his fun. I want him back and I hate it. I don’t know what to do but I know I probably shouldn’t involve myself with him again

By: Jeff Mac

Jeff Mac — Mon, 24 Sep 2007 13:29:31 +0000

1. I cheated, and was NOT broken up with about it. Never revealed it, and felt horribly guilty forever. It was probably worse than being dumped for it. Stupid, stupid. That was the last time I ever did THAT, I’ll tell you that much. Ugh.

2. Holy crap, those talkin’ dogs were unbelievable.

By: Lucy F.

Lucy F. — Sat, 22 Sep 2007 20:50:21 +0000

1. I have cheated. It was bad and wrong. I got broken-up-with for it, too. As well I should have. I think I’ve only been cheated-on once, and my reaction, believe it or not, was RELIEF, because I was ready to get out of the relationship, and it was a hell of a lot easier to say “begone cheater” than “begone, stoner-dude-who-only-ever-wants-to-stay-in-and-watch-zombie-movies
but-who-is-otherwise-ok.”

2. Apropos of nothing really, here is another funny dog video.
I want that dog at :39 to answer my phone.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kAKp1b6zH1E

By: Jeff Mac

Jeff Mac — Fri, 21 Sep 2007 20:45:13 +0000

Brie: Yes, a “second chance” does often turn into an endless bunch of crazy excuse-making.

I really do believe that it is possible for someone to make a mistake. But really, once is all they get on this one.

As our president said, Fool me twice…we don’t get fooled again.

By: Brie

Brie — Fri, 21 Sep 2007 19:01:14 +0000

I know so many women who have dealt with cheating boyfriends/husbands by saying “well if it happens ONE MORE TIME…” and that one more time happens but they find themselves saying it over and over again. If you haven’t left the relationship, or drastically “punished” him in a similar way (for example, moving out), you’re still tolerating that behavior. I love when people ask “my boyfriend just cheated on me, how can I trust him again?” because the answer is: you can’t. He just cheated on you. Only an adequate amount of time spent proving that he’s NOT a cheater can legitimately build that trust back. But who wants to go through that?