manslations

Well, you want to talk about your “out of my depth” moments? This is one o’ those. Anna is married to a man who has sexual fantasies — not so uncommon a complaint about men, several times on this website alone. However, in these fantasies, Mr. Anna sees himself as the woman. See…that’s a little [...]

A reader calling herself “Just Having Fun” is getting back a little too much reaction from the dudes on her co-ed sports team. (For the moment, I’m picturing a sort of a “roping kittens” version of a rodeo. Just what you get when you give me too non-specific of an image to deal with.) Her [...]

Well, it was bound to happen. The backlog of manslations requests is long enough that it has lapped itself. I’ve got a two-parter here — the 2nd one came in not long before I was just getting to the first. The text of the original is down below. I’ll focus more on the recent update [...]

Commenter and one-time, much-typing requester, Bloomsbury Bell, is back with another question. This time, it falls under the category of EXCEPTIONS. As in, if a dude calls in the very mid of night on Saturday, does it have to be a booty call? (The answer might surprise you. Unless you skipped ahead, in which case [...]

A reader named Sara is looking for some no-strings-attached, no-holds-barred, post-breakup nooky. And other hyphenates. She and the ol’ ex-er took the first step (i.e. the hot-t-t sex, if you know what I mean…oh hold on…that wasn’t a euphemism…eh, ok, so you know what I mean, fine.) and all seemed, at various moments, either hunky [...]

A reader named Jenna fears that she may have spooked her man with talk of the F word. No, not that F word. I’m sure he can speak about F-reedom or F-ornication or F-erris wheels just f-ine. The F…uture. But she wants to talk about it. How can she go about it without sending him [...]

And not like, “Tractor beam — engaged!” or other mechanical possibilities. I’m engaged to be married! I popped the question while Liz and I were on a short weekend away in New Mexico (as the sun was going down over the city of Albuquerque — awww, yeah) and, love of my life that she is, [...]

A return poster who now calls herself “Lychee Lisa” is having an issue with her gentleman friend pulling back from her. Could it be about his new Playstation 3? (hint: no.) And what should she do about it? Let’s get the details: hi jeff, yay, congrats on your book! i look forward to hearing all [...]

Sue’s gotten into it with a guy who’s just gotten OUT of it, it seems. He was married for 17 years, and split up a year ago. After 2 or 3 months dating Sue, our boy here has decided he is “scared of relationships” and the only way to get over it is to date [...]

A reader named Chloe has bagged herself a rich boy! However, he’s been burned before by women who just want him for his giant piles of doubloons that he keeps in bathtubs and pirate chests around the house. (For the purposes of this manslation, I will be picturing Scrooge McDuck. My website, my prerogative.) He’s [...]