Comments on: How to Talk to Him About the Future? http://manslations.com/2008/06/23/how-to-talk-to-him-about-the-future/ Advice for smart women who are tired of feeling so stupid about men. Mon, 23 Jan 2012 04:24:48 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.2.1 By: hunter http://manslations.com/2008/06/23/how-to-talk-to-him-about-the-future/comment-page-1/#comment-4632 hunter Tue, 24 Jun 2008 08:39:44 +0000 http://manslations.wordpress.com/?p=305#comment-4632 It is said, "A man wil never know a woman fully, until he gives her a ring." It is said, “A man wil never know a woman fully, until he gives her a ring.”

]]> By: mmagnolia http://manslations.com/2008/06/23/how-to-talk-to-him-about-the-future/comment-page-1/#comment-4631 mmagnolia Tue, 24 Jun 2008 02:00:47 +0000 http://manslations.wordpress.com/?p=305#comment-4631 Yes, Dears Selena & JM are on best-point! My 2-cent pose would be to reiterate emphasis on the 'WHY' for BOTH Ms. Jenna and HerGuy. The importance of 'Why" about any "future" talking [really! its A 'planning'!] makes sense because it impacts both. Regardless future lovebirding or not, He needs to know FOR HIMSELF 'why' talking about versus *living* THEIR future is problematic. AND, She needs her own self-knowledge about importance SHE attaches to that "why". Yessiree, just as our JM/S twins perfectly manslated, sooo Let's all go forth & be Do-right Dudleys first--for ourselves! Yes, Dears Selena & JM are on best-point! My 2-cent pose would be to reiterate emphasis on the ‘WHY’ for BOTH Ms. Jenna and HerGuy. The importance of ‘Why” about any “future” talking [really! its A 'planning'!] makes sense because it impacts both. Regardless future lovebirding or not, He needs to know FOR HIMSELF ‘why’ talking about versus *living* THEIR future is problematic. AND, She needs her own self-knowledge about importance SHE attaches to that “why”. Yessiree, just as our JM/S twins perfectly manslated, sooo Let’s all go forth & be Do-right Dudleys first–for ourselves!

]]> By: Selena http://manslations.com/2008/06/23/how-to-talk-to-him-about-the-future/comment-page-1/#comment-4630 Selena Mon, 23 Jun 2008 11:46:43 +0000 http://manslations.wordpress.com/?p=305#comment-4630 I think Jeff is right on target about YOU figuring out exactly what kind of future it is you want and why. You seem vague about this. Marriage? Living together? A promise ring? What does a promise ring mean to people in their 40's for heaven's sake? You are not teenagers wanting to marry when you finish school. Since you spend most nights together, you are already semi-living together. The benefit of officially living together is supporting one household instead of two. What are the benefits of marriage to you? After almost 2 yrs. together it's natural that you might want something more "official" than just dating if you expect the relationship to continue. But what is that, and again, why? If you're clear in your own mind, then it should be easy to explain to him and get his feedback rather than wait around for HIM to talk about it. If he's content the way things stand, he may never initiate the conversation--figuring if he doesn't bring it up, you'll let it go. As far as the demanding mother, mama's boy thing: only you can say whether or not this has been a problem in your relationship, or would be if you married or lived together. Or how much influence you think it has over him when it comes to making such decisions. Having the possibility of Momma living with you might be a factor to consider when changing the status quo from what it is now. I think Jeff is right on target about YOU figuring out exactly what kind of future it is you want and why. You seem vague about this. Marriage? Living together? A promise ring? What does a promise ring mean to people in their 40′s for heaven’s sake? You are not teenagers wanting to marry when you finish school.

Since you spend most nights together, you are already semi-living together. The benefit of officially living together is supporting one household instead of two. What are the benefits of marriage to you? After almost 2 yrs. together it’s natural that you might want something more “official” than just dating if you expect the relationship to continue. But what is that, and again, why? If you’re clear in your own mind, then it should be easy to explain to him and get his feedback rather than wait around for HIM to talk about it. If he’s content the way things stand, he may never initiate the conversation–figuring if he doesn’t bring it up, you’ll let it go.

As far as the demanding mother, mama’s boy thing: only you can say whether or not this has been a problem in your relationship, or would be if you married or lived together. Or how much influence you think it has over him when it comes to making such decisions. Having the possibility of Momma living with you might be a factor to consider when changing the status quo from what it is now.

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