Comments on: How to Ask a Man for What You Want Without Nagging

By: PT-LawMom

PT-LawMom — Sat, 06 Dec 2008 04:38:41 +0000

You know, this may sound like a simple one but I definitely understand where she is coming from. I ALWAYS feel like I am nagging. I also feel like I have to over-explain everything so that the guy will understand my motivation and that it is me, not him and blah, blah, blah, blah. Just had that conversation tonight, actually, so it was interesting timing that I came here and read this. Hmmm.

By: mmagnolia

mmagnolia — Thu, 04 Dec 2008 06:04:00 +0000

Dear Sophia,
Our *Prof* is prettyPerfectly on-point.

His conclusion that “every moment is
building the future” says ALL 2say! His threesome of *positive inputs, mutual
goals, and value added* support that conclusion! Simple+true+easy 2apply.

However, “Jess”dear shares an =point! Eggshells have no place hereabouts. [BTW: !eggwhite masks Rgreat 4pores!]

Sooo, apply JM’s exercise *second2* verifying that all eggshells are only in both Your composts. Yes…that’s a critical chitchat 2have w/Messr. Attentive. He should welcome Your kind of attention.

Then: 4evr, Happy TenderTrysts!

By: jess

jess — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 20:40:05 +0000

So true about the ICK in the mommy/son relationship

But JM, you point out that a lot of men don’t know the difference between nagging and asking either. Some even set you up – complain that you don’t directly ask for what you want. But when you do, it’s bossy, bitchy, complaining and nagging (no matter how you word it).

Can we put it out there – if asking for what you want makes you feel like you’re walking on eggshells, then perhaps “nagging” is a red-herring – that there’s something else wrong with the relationship?

By: T

Wed, 03 Dec 2008 19:48:53 +0000

GREAT MANSLATION!!!

But can I remember it in the moment?

*sigh*

By: Liz C

Liz C — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 17:36:13 +0000

You know, after years and years of that, sometimes it gets really tiring having to stop and figure out *exactly* how to say things so as not to trigger a negative reaction. I do the best I can, but sometimes it takes more mental energy than I have available. And sometimes even phrasing it *just so* doesn’t help.

For example, sometimes I just want to say ‘Please just pick up the damned socks! I don’t care if you’ve got mommy issues. I hate picking up after you.’

There- whew! I feel better. Thanks.