Comments on: She’s Getting Some…But Not Enough

By: PT-LawMom

PT-LawMom — Sat, 13 Dec 2008 18:34:58 +0000

Welcome to my world. And, damn it, I keep going back for more and waiting for things to change. I’ve tried the direct route. Even gone so far as saying directly, “Hey, how about bringing some porn over to watch with me.” [He didn't...] I’m kind of at the end of my very tearful rope. Of course, stupid me, he has met my kid, he owes me money (yes, I know, I know) and I don’t think my heart can handle a breakup right now. But, really, WTF?!?

Can’t wait until finals are over so I can read your whole book, Jeff. It’s taunting me from across the room right now.

By: over in France

over in France — Wed, 10 Dec 2008 18:25:04 +0000

I’m worried the cat will lose out.

By: KC

KC — Wed, 10 Dec 2008 11:31:20 +0000

Oh – and thanks to everyone else who has provided me with advice/reco’s!

By: KC

KC — Wed, 10 Dec 2008 11:30:52 +0000

Great manslation Jeff – I really appreciate your help with this one!

By: mmagnolia

mmagnolia — Wed, 10 Dec 2008 03:56:13 +0000

Dear KC,
!Your *It* seems 2B mostly optimistic. U’ve got excellent feedback 2put some Play-into-Yourplay!

Ymmy…TheJM spot re-”greed is good” regarding *affection*. The Prong One is the cat’s last meow. Any earsplitting silence from YourFella can make a Clean TKO–sooo, t’is a win-win 4U!

Dear JM, post-authorshipping:
In lieu of disappearing catslations [sooo, like A Kitty], some of us bark 4dogslations!

By: laura

laura — Tue, 09 Dec 2008 20:59:37 +0000

Matching on every level except the sexual level equals no go to me…I tried that and it just does not work…if you are willing to settle that is one thing but for me I am just not.

By: jess

jess — Tue, 09 Dec 2008 20:49:15 +0000

Oh dear, this one hits close to home, brought back TERRIBLE memories… Thought he was The One and hung in there WAY too long… Same story – after about 3 months the sex life hit the skids, even though the friendship part couldn’t have been better. First he denied the obvious. Then it was “stress at work”. Then it was in general a “lower sex drive.” All very plausible (see JM’s list above). Didn’t learn about his other life until AFTER we started living together (hate the really SMART & “respectable” sociopaths). Turns out he was a porn addict AND liked to pay for strange. To him, THAT was good sex, so I couldn’t possibly do it for him. But he still wanted me for companionship. Maybe he did love me, but so what? It sure as hell wasn’t what I wanted. The worst part of it tho was all the lies…

Not sayin’ this is what YOU’LL find, KC – give JM’s advice a whirl, but keep your eyes open!

By: Angie

Angie — Tue, 09 Dec 2008 20:17:38 +0000

You shouldn’t be with someone who is making you feel irritable/annoyed, even/especially if they aren’t doing anything “wrong”! — Wow, what a simple thing to say, yet so true! And yet, we don’t always “see” that. It’s like we’re trying to make things that don’t fit actually fit. You’ve just manslated MY problem for me. Thanks.

By: Lisa

Lisa — Tue, 09 Dec 2008 14:42:00 +0000

OK I just *have* to comment on this one — specifically b/c of the cat-affection “problem.” You see, I dated a guy once who I really really clicked with on a lot of levels, but he gave his damn dog all kinds of attention, all the time — plenty more than he ever gave to me. I really thought I was crazy, getting annoyed with that (I have a wonderful dog and I love her to death and I love other people who treat their animals right!).

And the thing is, I kind of was crazy, and I kind of wasn’t for feeling like this. On the one hand, every man (or woman) has a right to give his or her pet(s) the attention they deserve. I’m all for that. On the other hand, I began to realize that the fact that *this* particular fact annoyed me — I mean, really bugged me — meant, um, maybe this person wasn’t actually the right “fit” after all (as the manslator has noted!).

Anyway, my point is, if something just isn’t sitting right — even if it means you’re crazy/irrational — it’s important. Because you shouldn’t be with someone who is making you feel irritable/annoyed, even/especially if they aren’t doing anything “wrong”!

Good luck!
– Lisa
p.s. congrats on the book, JM!