Comments on: When He Says He Hates The Phone http://manslations.com/2008/12/19/when-he-says-he-hates-the-phone/ Ask for Jeff Mac's advice on what men think -- about relationships, dating, sex, love, squirrels, whatever. Tue, 07 Sep 2010 00:30:34 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.0.1 By: Melissa http://manslations.com/2008/12/19/when-he-says-he-hates-the-phone/comment-page-1/#comment-5817 Melissa Thu, 01 Jan 2009 01:07:44 +0000 http://manslations.com/?p=1310#comment-5817 I'm TOTALLY in agreement with Seductress Within....men are NOT stupid, but can tend be on the lazy side when they're lukewarm about a woman...when they're interested, they know just what to do to keep her around. It's high time for women to stop coddling them. Don't go out of your way to be difficult, no, just don't tolerate the BS and make excuses for them. And....not only would I NOT 'remind' him that he suggested another date, in addition to that I wouldn't be real quick on the draw to return his text messages, either. Let him wonder what happened...who knows, maybe it will pique his curiousity enough to generate a phone call from him. Then you can tell him that you get tired of texting and need a break from time to time....let's see how he deals with the shoe being on the other foot. My bad? ;) I’m TOTALLY in agreement with Seductress Within….men are NOT stupid, but can tend be on the lazy side when they’re lukewarm about a woman…when they’re interested, they know just what to do to keep her around. It’s high time for women to stop coddling them. Don’t go out of your way to be difficult, no, just don’t tolerate the BS and make excuses for them.

And….not only would I NOT ‘remind’ him that he suggested another date, in addition to that I wouldn’t be real quick on the draw to return his text messages, either. Let him wonder what happened…who knows, maybe it will pique his curiousity enough to generate a phone call from him. Then you can tell him that you get tired of texting and need a break from time to time….let’s see how he deals with the shoe being on the other foot.

My bad? ;)

]]> By: The Seductress Within http://manslations.com/2008/12/19/when-he-says-he-hates-the-phone/comment-page-1/#comment-5784 The Seductress Within Sun, 21 Dec 2008 19:47:28 +0000 http://manslations.com/?p=1310#comment-5784 #1...Don't prod him with the "when are we getting together again?" question. Big mistake. If a man is interested, he will be asking you out. He may feel only lukewarm about you, be dating other women, figuring out if he even wants to see you again. Don't turn into the pursuer! #2...men who keep communication to texting and emailing (esp. in the beginning) do so ON PURPOSE for the reasons I gave in #1. It's impersonal, sets a very casual tone, gives a "arms length" feel. When a man is really into a woman he'll call her. Because he wants the communication more personal. It may take some serial emailers longer to get to that point though. I'd not contact him again. Set your sights elsewhere, if HE asks you out again and you want to, go for it. #1…Don’t prod him with the “when are we getting together again?” question. Big mistake. If a man is interested, he will be asking you out. He may feel only lukewarm about you, be dating other women, figuring out if he even wants to see you again. Don’t turn into the pursuer!

#2…men who keep communication to texting and emailing (esp. in the beginning) do so ON PURPOSE for the reasons I gave in #1. It’s impersonal, sets a very casual tone, gives a “arms length” feel.

When a man is really into a woman he’ll call her. Because he wants the communication more personal. It may take some serial emailers longer to get to that point though.

I’d not contact him again. Set your sights elsewhere, if HE asks you out again and you want to, go for it.

]]> By: Sassy http://manslations.com/2008/12/19/when-he-says-he-hates-the-phone/comment-page-1/#comment-5783 Sassy Sun, 21 Dec 2008 13:15:23 +0000 http://manslations.com/?p=1310#comment-5783 While i agree that this young lady should tell him to step up, phone and make a date, I will say that there are nice guys who are not phone callers. My lovely boyfriend is a not a phone talker. Sure, when we started dating he called and emailed a lot to keep in touch and keep my interest. Now, after 10+ months, I know he used the phone for more "business" with me. When he's coming to pick me up, what we're going to do, etc. Granted, we see each other almost every day and he is glad to be my boyfriend, meet my family and friends, etc. So the phone stuff is small potatoes. Good luck! While i agree that this young lady should tell him to step up, phone and make a date, I will say that there are nice guys who are not phone callers.

My lovely boyfriend is a not a phone talker. Sure, when we started dating he called and emailed a lot to keep in touch and keep my interest. Now, after 10+ months, I know he used the phone for more “business” with me. When he’s coming to pick me up, what we’re going to do, etc.

Granted, we see each other almost every day and he is glad to be my boyfriend, meet my family and friends, etc. So the phone stuff is small potatoes.

Good luck!

]]> By: Ms.X http://manslations.com/2008/12/19/when-he-says-he-hates-the-phone/comment-page-1/#comment-5782 Ms.X Sun, 21 Dec 2008 02:49:28 +0000 http://manslations.com/?p=1310#comment-5782 Even I cant buy the "I'm not a phone person" excuse ! I somehow cant buy it ! It always was odd to me, hearing it from a friend of mine, who got this excuse from her date ! Turned out, he had several female "friends" with whom he would talk on phone for hours, and didn't have time for his gf ! I'm not hinting, all men who use this excuse are essentially emotional cheaters, but somehow the excuse itself sounds odd to me ! I personally think, a person who likes the other enough, wants to spend time talking, using any medium or technology, if they can't meet every other day ! I personally think this gut feeling comes naturally, no matter, if its a guy or a girl ! But yes, agree on the part, where you should "let the guy know", that you would love to talk to him over phone, and, just give it one chance ! Even I cant buy the “I’m not a phone person” excuse ! I somehow cant buy it ! It always was odd to me, hearing it from a friend of mine, who got this excuse from her date ! Turned out, he had several female “friends” with whom he would talk on phone for hours, and didn’t have time for his gf !

I’m not hinting, all men who use this excuse are essentially emotional cheaters, but somehow the excuse itself sounds odd to me ! I personally think, a person who likes the other enough, wants to spend time talking, using any medium or technology, if they can’t meet every other day ! I personally think this gut feeling comes naturally, no matter, if its a guy or a girl !

But yes, agree on the part, where you should “let the guy know”, that you would love to talk to him over phone, and, just give it one chance !

]]> By: Tina T http://manslations.com/2008/12/19/when-he-says-he-hates-the-phone/comment-page-1/#comment-5781 Tina T Sat, 20 Dec 2008 23:48:42 +0000 http://manslations.com/?p=1310#comment-5781 You've totally let him run the show. Ask him when You're going to see him again, and if he can't come up with a specific time, then forget him. You’ve totally let him run the show. Ask him when You’re going to see him again, and if he can’t come up with a specific time, then forget him.

]]> By: mmagnolia http://manslations.com/2008/12/19/when-he-says-he-hates-the-phone/comment-page-1/#comment-5780 mmagnolia Sat, 20 Dec 2008 18:04:37 +0000 http://manslations.com/?p=1310#comment-5780 Dear Kristi! Gratias2Ms. *moody* re-That "avoid" of stuff which is veddy unhealthy Anywise! An Absolute = Slice & Dice those cloudy comments [His + !Yours]. BTW: how's about next{?] time sending a *welcome back, sweetPea* e-lovenote... On Your "is he going to...actually ask": 2 avenues 4answer = U actually ask Him or Heaven2Kristi, actually ask Him2askU! Pick YourPetunia; Cheers 2CozyClosure! Dear Kristi!
Gratias2Ms. *moody* re-That “avoid” of stuff which is veddy unhealthy Anywise!

An Absolute = Slice & Dice those cloudy comments [His + !Yours].

BTW: how’s about next{?] time sending a *welcome back, sweetPea* e-lovenote…

On Your “is he going to…actually ask”:
2 avenues 4answer = U actually ask Him or Heaven2Kristi, actually ask Him2askU!

Pick YourPetunia; Cheers 2CozyClosure!

]]> By: moody.bitch http://manslations.com/2008/12/19/when-he-says-he-hates-the-phone/comment-page-1/#comment-5779 moody.bitch Fri, 19 Dec 2008 21:45:06 +0000 http://manslations.com/?p=1310#comment-5779 I don't know if I buy this "hates talking on the phone" business. After all, he managed to survive it for at least *two* calls (presumably in order to score that "first date"). I'd be curious to know what he does for a living. Does he *never* have to use the phone for work? If I knew that phone calls were important to me, and a new guy told me upfront he hated talking on the phone, I'd not let that comment go without exploring it a little more to find out exactly where he's coming from. Because, like it or not, there are many men who avoid using the phone as a way to "manage down" the expectations of women they're dating. I don’t know if I buy this “hates talking on the phone” business. After all, he managed to survive it for at least *two* calls (presumably in order to score that “first date”).

I’d be curious to know what he does for a living. Does he *never* have to use the phone for work?

If I knew that phone calls were important to me, and a new guy told me upfront he hated talking on the phone, I’d not let that comment go without exploring it a little more to find out exactly where he’s coming from. Because, like it or not, there are many men who avoid using the phone as a way to “manage down” the expectations of women they’re dating.

]]> By: Liz C http://manslations.com/2008/12/19/when-he-says-he-hates-the-phone/comment-page-1/#comment-5777 Liz C Fri, 19 Dec 2008 17:04:20 +0000 http://manslations.com/?p=1310#comment-5777 You'd think guys would eventually figure it out and get hot on that mindreading thing. It would make my life so much easier!! You’d think guys would eventually figure it out and get hot on that mindreading thing. It would make my life so much easier!!

]]> By: T http://manslations.com/2008/12/19/when-he-says-he-hates-the-phone/comment-page-1/#comment-5776 T Fri, 19 Dec 2008 16:45:15 +0000 http://manslations.com/?p=1310#comment-5776 I love how you remind us girls that men don' t always know <i>what we think they should know</i>. I guess we tend to forget that they can't read our minds... I love how you remind us girls that men don’ t always know what we think they should know. I guess we tend to forget that they can’t read our minds…

]]> By: TJo http://manslations.com/2008/12/19/when-he-says-he-hates-the-phone/comment-page-1/#comment-5775 TJo Fri, 19 Dec 2008 13:38:44 +0000 http://manslations.com/?p=1310#comment-5775 Once you've made it clear to him that you'd be interested in a 2nd date, if he doesn't come through forget about him. People make time for the things they want to make time for. Good Luck Once you’ve made it clear to him that you’d be interested in a 2nd date, if he doesn’t come through forget about him. People make time for the things they want to make time for. Good Luck

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